Unfortunately, all of these static measurements fail to address how an ABS sensor can be used to determine the difference in dynamic tire diameter and circumference to infer a change in air pressure. The only way this can be accomplished is if the tires are turning at different speeds. When travelling straight, this means their effective diameters/circumferences are clearly different. Or am I missing somthing obvious here?

Sorry, but tire pressure clearly does affect the effective diameter and circumference of a tire. "Real world experience, plus 2 science degrees and 1 engineering degree" does not mean you're always right. Can you possibly provide a single unbiased outside source of data to support your position? (Even Einstein was wrong at times.)